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Above Water

Avril Lavigne's Head Above Water really hit me when I first heard it, and it continues to each time I hear it.  I was on the treadmill when it came on my Pandora and as I listened, I started to cry.  Today, as it played through my car speakers I tried to put into words how the song speaks to me

I've gotta keep everybody calm before MY "storm" (surgery)

My life is what I am fighting for <-- This line is EXACT. I chose this procedure to have a chance to live a longer life.

My voice is my driving force.  I made this decision, I am my #1 fan, I am my support, I am willpower, I am my motivation, and I can do anything.

God, keep me brave, I will survive this
When it gets rough, don't let me fail, save me from myself
When I get scared, help me shake it off, I need you

I can't see my goals when there is "stormy weather" (bad day, hungry, etc.) and its hard to hold it together, but I can't keep going like this (the way I am now) forever

 I am too young to die

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It makes me sad but it motivates me.  Being overweight my entire life has BUT hasn't effected me. I have a happy life but weight always hangs in the background.  I am sad that I am 30 and I haven't overcame it but I am so motivated to FINALLY overcome it.  Mostly, I am so proud of myself for how far I have come and for making the decision to be around longer for my family. 

Take a moment and listen to the song and hear her lyrics

Click here to hear the song

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